Friday, August 23, 2013
How to stop eating your emotions & live a life you'll love
Do you eat because you are bored?
Do you eat because you are tired?
Do you eat because you are stressed?
Do you eat because you are happy?
Do you eat because you are sad?
Do you eat just because??
What is emotional eating? Basically whenever you eat when you are not hungry. Mindless munching, craving comfort foods, eating until you are way passed full. If you feel guilty after you eat, that is emotional eating. Emotional eating can sabotage our weight loss efforts, and is most likely the cause of our weight issues in the first place.
What causes emotional eating? Stress makes us crave greasy salty foods. Foods that give instant gratification, that quick hit of pleasure and quick burst of energy. The more stressed out you are, the more likely you are to turn to food for relief. Food is also used as a temporary escape from emotions we don't feel comfortable feeling. Food is simply a distraction to avoid the situations we find ourselves in. It could be money, relationships, love, family, career- food is a cheap and easy distraction. Emotional eating can also stem from habits we picked up as kids. Food could be used as a reward or driven by nostalgia & the memories it brings up. Emotional eating can also be caused by social situations - simply because it is there and everyone else is eating.
So now that I've talked about what causes emotional eating, where do we go from here?
We talk about HOW we can stop emotional eating.
The most effective weapon to combat emotional eating is having a strategy.
Planning.
You know the saying, failing to plan is planning to fail.
Without a plan we are on a free for all, anything goes and before we know it - we are packing on the pounds and pulling out the elastic waistbands. The best strategy to overcome emotional eating is to plan.
Plan what you will eat.
Plan when you will eat.
Plan for the unexpected.
Plan what to do when you get the urge to eat when you are not hungry.
Plan what to do when you find yourself shoving food in your face.
Plan what to do when you have totally blown it.
SO first, plan what you will eat.
This is pretty simple but it does take a little research and some forethought. I have Sunday as my planning day. I plan my meals for the week, make a grocery list and shop for the week. I make sure that my meals are plant based and mostly clean. I also have my shake for breakfast everyday so that takes care of that. I have salads for lunch - I'll add some nuts or beans and make my own dressing. Dinner is often some combination of roasted squash, quinoa, beans, and steamed veggies. There are so many great recipes available on line. If you need help with your meal planning or would like me to send you a sample meal plan, please shoot me an email asking for one and I'd be happy to help.
Planning when you will eat is pretty simple and so effective. If you get in the habit of eating at scheduled times, you won't find yourself at 5 in the afternoon ravished and reaching for some crappy junk food. You can set an alarm on your phone to remind you when to eat. There are even some apps. that will do it for you. I highly recommend doing this. It'll really help you stay on track.
Plan for the unexpected. Things happen. You get caught up in a tight deadline, you forgot your lunch at home, you are running errands all day and have lost track of time. It's inevitable. It's going to happen. So what do you do? Plan for the unexpected. Throw some snacks in your car. Some raw almonds or cashews, a few lara bars, even a couple of apples. Also keep them at your desk at work. If you forget your lunch, have a strategy, know where and what you will order - make sure you make it smart, no cheese, dressing on the side, no fries! Pick it out before you are starving and will eat anything at any cost. Same goes if you are headed out to a restaurant. Look at the menu ahead of time or as soon as you get there. Make a smart choice and stick to it.
Plan what to do when you get the urge to eat when you are not hungry
ask yourself:
Am I hungry? If the answer is no. Then DON'T EAT. If the answer is yes, ask yourself,
Is this what I feel like eating? Do you really want to fuel your body with sugar and fat and salt and calories that will just keep you fat and tired and further from your goal? If your answer is YES. Go back to the first question. are you REALLY hungry? Maybe you are just thirsty- make sure you are drinking tons of water! Often times we mistake thirst for hunger.
Last thing before you take that first bite....Is there something I could eat instead?
I used to work with this woman who told me she was griping it her boyfriend about being hungry and he told her to eat some carrots. We started saying "Hungry? Eat a carrot!" it was the office joke. Funny enough, it was sage advice and I use it to this day! Put that in your daily mantra. It will help keep it in the forefront of your mind & keep you on track.
So, when you are standing in front of the fridge ask yourself, would I eat a stick of celery right now? If the answer is no, you're not hungry! If the answer is YES! I'm hungry then go for it! Chow down on some celery- if you are ravished, have a few almonds, too or put a little peanut butter on the celery. How awesome do you feel right now? GO you! Give yourself a high five! Give yourself a gold star on your forehead! Write out a congratulatory note to yourself. "On this day, I really wanted to shove some cookies in my face, instead, I stopped myself and I ate some celery! Woo-hoo" Then write how you are feeling because I bet you feel amazing! Breaking habits are hard. We crave stability. Everything in our nature fights to stay the same. We don't like change. So when you are able to conquer these small little victories, it's just a small glimpse of what you could accomplish. If you did it once, you can do it again! It may sound silly and trite but actually, it's not, it's huge. It's those small little things we do everyday that will lead to our demise or our success. So celebrate what gets you closer to your goal.
If you are not hungry but you have the urge to eat. Do something else instead. Seriously, distract yourself or better yet, work through the emotion, if you are not hungry, what are you feeling? Bored? Angry? Sad? Lonely? Hey if you're bored- go for a walk, dance, read a good book! If it's something you can't figure out or solve in the moment- if you don't really know what you are feeling, try journaling. Lots of things come out when we write. When we get it on paper we get it out of our head. We answer questions we didn't even know we had. We figure out things, come up with solutions. It just gives us a chance to let it out. Most people don't write enough. I don't write enough. Writing is a HUGE tool in battling emotional eating. In fact, journaling everyday can really help you deal with those emotions that we satiate with food. As a matter of fact, there is a great book out there I'd like to recommend, "The Writing Diet" by Julia Cameron. She goes more in depth into what I am talking about and shares even more tools to help you use writing to overcome emotional eating.
Plan what to do when you find yourself shoving food in your face:
You might just blow thru those questions and say- SCREW IT! I'm HONGRY! And start shoveling chips in your throat. As soon as this happens pay attention. It doesn't have to be an all out pig fest. You can stop at anytime, YOU CAN! Because you know a little voice in your head is telling you that you are not really hungry, you should stop. Listen to that little voice. Stay calm. Put the chips down and back slowly away- then turn and run as fast as you can! Give yourself a few minutes to recover. Drink some water. Pace about. Then ask yourself, once again, "Am I truly hungry? What can I eat instead?
Plan what to do when you have totally blown it. You ate your emotions and now you feel even worse. You're staring at the bottom of an empty container of ice cream and asking yourself "what just happened?" in sugared out days with your stomach already starting to whine and groan back at you. Now, what do you do? Well, here's what you don't do, you don't beat yourself up. You don't forget about it and repeat it again tomorrow. You LEARN from it. Take a moment and think about how you feel. Take a mental snapshot of your physical and emotional state. I'm sorry, your body tells you when you've really blown it. You need to listen to your body. It would really help you if you wrote it down. Write down how you felt and post it on your refrigerator. Better yet, write a love letter to your future self. A gentle reminder of how your future self will feel, once again, staring at the bottom of a empty container of ice cream. Get as real, graphic and emotional as you can. Remember how your belly ached? How the skin stretched? How you just felt so uncomfortable? Not only that but you felt defeated. Upset, you let yourself down.
One other way to beat emotional eating? Recognize true physical hunger. I'm sure you've heard that it takes your mind a while to register that you are full. Often times we don't pay attention to that signal and we eat until we are STUFFED. Pay attention to your hunger while you are eating. Usually food loses it's flavor in the first few bites, and we are just shoveling food in until our plate is empty out of habit.
Also, find a partner to keep you accountable and help you thru those times when all you want to do is drown your sorrows in drink or hunker down with a big bag of potato chips.
Learning to overcome you emotional eating will bring you so many rewards. Not only will it help you achieve a healthy weight, it will give you power in knowing what you have achieved. You will find ways to deal with your emotions instead of avoiding them. Life will be so much more satisfying and fulfilling.
Now, emotional eating doesn't happen overnight. It is deep rooted and something that usually has begun in childhood. Habits are not easy to break. It will take time, don't give up! If you continue to practice what I shared here, you will get a little better everyday.
Please comment below what you are planning to put into action from this!
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