My Journey

I have always struggled with my weight. Since I was about 8 years old. I found comfort in food. Besides being called freckle face and ugly, I was then tormented and teased for being fat. I was always trying to lose weight. I would order crazy pills from the backs of magazines, I would go on crazy starvation diets and workout 2 times a day. I managed to keep the weight of for the most part but the damage was done. In my head, I was still fat. I was less than. I was not worthy.

When I went away to college, I gained the ominous freshman 10 - which was really 30. TIired of wearing elastic waist bands, I started a 90 day challenge and lost the extra 30 pounds. I yo-yo'ed for the next several years, keeping it off for the most part, but never making any progress. In the last few years, I started losing the battle and my weight started creeping up again. I was suffering from bouts of depression and feeling hopeless. I had given up on trying to be fit and accepted that I would be out of shape the rest of my life. I hated looking in the mirror. My closet was getting smaller and smaller as less stuff was fitting everyday. I was hiding my body in large tops and leggings. I would also hide my body in pictures- or avoid being photographed at all.

I used my weight as an EXCUSE for not achieving things in life. In October of 2011, I stuffed myself into my first spanx. I felt resigned - like it was too late, might as well face it, this was what I was dealt, time for compression undergarments. I was still trying tho, I was juicing.  But I was not in a good place- I was juicing but not adjusting the rest of my lifestyle to that, I was still gaining weight.

This is embarrassing to admit. When I would go out and drink socially I would BLACK OUT. Not good. Like Snooky-style. I couldn’t believe it. I NEVER believed that people REALLY don’t remember what they do when they get that drunk. I thought they were lying, or just lying to themselves. Nope, WRONG. I learned this lesson the hard way. As a matter of fact, the night this picture was taken I blacked out & fell. I woke up with a badly bruised (probably sprained) foot. I couldn’t workout for a month and I decided to give up juicing.

Needless to say, with the holidays right around the corner, my weight started steadily increasing. It wasn’t until mid March of 2012 that I found Beachbody and found the motivation to change my life for the better. I was googling late one night "before/after weight loss" desperately searching for any motivation to get myself off of the path I was going down and came across a Youtube of someone's transformation form P90X. I reached out to that person, who became my coach and thru her motivationan, mentoring and support, I was able to turn my ship around. I lost 15 pounds in 60 days.

I've kept it off for the last year and continue to lose and tone and now I have become a coach myself. I have met SO many amazing people. I am so EXCITED to be on this journey. More important than the physical changes I have been experiencing... Since finding Beachbody, I have gained back FAITH in myself & the power of believing in myself...that I AM capable. I have the power to do anything I set out to do. That I am worthy of my place in the world & I have the power achieve my dreams. I want to be the best person I can be and I am helping others do the same.